This picture is not my own.
I found it on google and then edited the contrasting a bit.
So this is my very first blog and I thought I'd skip introductions and dive right in. I figure if you're reading this you A. all ready know me or B. want to get to know me, so for those who already know me know somewhat about me and for those who don't, what better way then to read what I have to say? I mean the more you read the more you will find out! So read on! I mean how can you genuinely get to know someone with just a few written paragraphs of their life summed up? I think the most interesting way to learn about anything is finding out as it deems necessary or relevant to the time or topic.
Well as noted by my location, I am living in Laie, Hawaii, which is on the Northern part of Oahu. I go to school here, BYU Hawaii to be specific. I love it. It has been an amazing experience where I have done some pretty sweet stuff and met and made friends with some incredible people, and hope to meet many more and do many more life changing experiences.
Ok so obviously by the date we all know what is coming up. Christmas. Which means the end of the semester and everyone will be going home. Everyone but me. I have very mixed feelings about this. Sometimes I'm pretty beat up about it because I want to see my friends back home, my friends here are leaving so it will be less lively around here and of course I want to see my mom along with the rest of my family, though I will say I am very fortunate to have two of my lovely sisters who I love so much to spend this holiday with. But to be honest, I want to be able to say "I'm home!", I want to be in my room again, walk in my backyard, play with my dogs, talk to my little sister and tease her and give her advice, maybe argue with my mom and dad, jokingly of course ;) haha, I wanna see my bratty little neices and hug them and force them to say they love me too by bribing them with cookies. I want to need a heavy jacket outside at the beginning of the day and then be naked half way through because it randomly got hot out. I want to drive in my car with the windows down and music blaring while screaming my lungs out. I want to be able to laugh with my friends because nothing we say or do is serious. I want to be able to just say and do the things I would normally say or do and no one question it because they know, thats just what I do it! I want to be able to walk through or pass by a place and have a million of thoughts and memories rushing through my mind, making me feel happy, sad, and excited all at once. I want to just have at least ONE conversation that isn't about something someone once did or likes to do or revolves soley around that one person. I want to talk about topics and things we both love and can relate to or did together or plan to do together! I'm sure everyone can say they've had an amazing, incredible and unique life full of experiences, but always talking about when you once did something that was more amazing then what someone else was just talking about makes me start to wonder, who are you trying to convince... me or you? I feel like nothing which I've been rambling on about is really coherent but I guess what I'm mainly trying to say is there's so much to life. Its very similar to food I'd say. When eating, you feel happy with what you have but you see other foods that look just as good or better and decide to eventually try as well, and then you see or taste something that reminds you of a food you once had but have no means of getting some where ever you may be at the moment or are just to full to eat at that time, so you begin to crave it from the impossibility of having it once again. So the same with life. There's the things we are doing at the moment that we should do our best and enjoy as we live them. There are the things we will come to do and should do our best to achieve them and say, "I did it." And then there are the things in the past we once did and wish we still had, but will never be able to do exactly the same, so all we can do is look back and reflect and learn. But it is important to never look back for too long, because you can begin lose yourself and wish for things you may never get back or have again and lose the things that you have gained and worked so hard for since. So in a sense all the things that i've just said I want are my cravings. I crave to feel and do all the things I spent my life day to day doing back home in Texas. But because of some unseen reason I'm supposed to stay just where I am at the moment, and all I can do is live my life as it comes and remember it as it once was and crave, crave to have it as I once enjoyed it.
