For Keeps. part 1

  It's funny how we never truly know what's wrong. We take stabs and jabs and guesses, but most of the time all that we find are really big messes. It's only when we take down the walls and  break down the ice that we're able to grow tall and truly feel nice.
  For so long did I fight to learn perfection, to feel strong in my knowledge of correction while building a thick exterior. Every step a new move to be right, never sure of my own intention, but determined to be in some way superior.
  Never did I imagine that every intricate detail I found would grow too tall for a vision so small, that it would show to not be so humble after all am  easily crumble with just one sound.
  The sound of your breath growing too shallow for my comfort and the sensation of your kisses getting too distant. I tried to grasp at all that I could, some how we both must have misunderstood. Suddenly I was surrounded by dark, praying for just one spark to strain to see your shadow and desperately follow, but something had become much too different.
  Crying and convinced I was dying, I finally let go and all the answers came piling. For too long had I refused to let myself be confused that every explanation only buried my freedom much deeper. Everyone since him that I've tried to let in, it wouldn't take me long to suspect them their sin, not realizing they were probably a keeper.

11.20.15